Hipsters Always Post Extra-Long Titles Because They're Unusual and Witty

Currently having internal debates about my large collection of hipster-esque music. I want to dump all the songs out of my Spotify but the problem is that I actually like the fucking music. It's embarrassing that what I have doesn't even compare to how much I don't add to the list because it's just too hipster. That's Foxy Shazam. Ever heard of them? No, of course not. I'm just so much better at finding new artists than you.

"Hipsters reject the culturally-ignorant attitudes of mainstream consumers, and are often seen wearing vintage and thrift store inspired fashions, tight-fitting jeans, old-school sneakers, and sometimes thick-rimmed glasses" (urbandictionary.com)

The thing that really gets me about hipsters is the fucking condescension and smugness that clearly they are better than everyone else at finding unusual things. The problem with that is that they didn't really find most things. They put in a search term on Etsy or found some obscure music website from Google. It's not really that hard to do. Hipsters can only really relate to other hipsters if something is remotely accessible, and if it's somewhat accessible, someone else has found it. Sorry if it breaks your hip, grey-colored unusual heart, but you can't be original like that.

I think true hipsters are vagrants who got out too early from mental hospitals and still think they are princes of the galaxy. They have no conception of mainstream, so it's almost impossible for them to follow it. They are pretty much the only group of people going their own way.

About twelve times a day, I pause to just scroll through my music and wonder what the fuck I find so enjoyable about this music. My music has never been sacred to me. I can't say that music is my life because it just isn't. It becomes boring pretty quickly. There's no one band that can keep my attention for a very long time. Maybe I like hipster music because there's so much of it. It's all the same with different lyrics or horn sections. Long, stringy hair, v-necks, and old-sounding voices. "Unusual" love songs and songs about grammar or something undecipherable. Oh, and of course, falling in love at a coffee shop, every hipster's dream.

Not everything I like is hipster music, but a lot of it they'd probably listen to ironically. God, I've got Noah and the Whale on the list. Morningwood. Lana Del Rey, Mother Mother, Noah Gallagher's High-Flying Birds, and plenty of other nameless "The [something something]s" bands. And on top of that, I know the words.

One thing I've noticed is that hipsters like to be acknowledged as hipsters here in small-town Indiana, but without saying it themselves. It makes them feel as if all their work was not for naught. Most likely in other, bigger cities, they hate it, but only because that makes them feel like part of a category. Now, I'm all for being unique and having unique interests, but I think we can all agree that the interests of the common hipster are the same. Add to this the self-important air of knowing what is better and you've got an asshole, not a unique individual.

Maybe I'm an asshole. But I don't consider myself a better person for having found a new song or a cool pair of aviators. I don't need to wear vintage clothes to feel different. My brain is fucked enough to be different on its own without having to show it off. That being said, what to do about my mass of hipster music? Do I just let it go? If I don't, I'm just as bad, caring about something that doesn't need to be. But with all these new layers of society, I just don't know what is good anymore. I can't just make a joke or write something without people thinking that there are extra layers that all mean something different. No, I mean what I say and what you see is what I wanted to put out there.

I must be over-thinking it. Things aren't this complicated, are they? Fuck.