Happy Thanksgiving and Such

Meanwhile, at TH Evan's, we're thankful for dick upstairs neighbors who stomp down the stairs and sound dumb, and the neighbors to our right who have a fucking nightmare child and slam lots of doors. Thanks for making us feel at home.

It's not bad living here, though. It's actually pretty great, save for those two annoyances. Quiet and pleasant and affordable and we can do what we want all the time. Pretty soon we'll do another podcast episode, but we've been busy playing computer games until I pass out, so give us a break.

Today is Thanksgiving, so no doubt you are reading this after hours, when things finally settle down and football game has been won. It's seventy degrees here and we're going to make cheeseburgers with real ground-up beef. No turkey, no stuffing, no holidays and no worries. After the weekend, I'm going to go to the gym right next to WalMart and inquire about my application, but we really aren't strapped for cash right now.

Thanksgiving has always been a weird time for me. I have no qualms about getting together with my family, but what are we really celebrating? Those jerk pilgrims who stole land and whose kids lied about it so they could eat a giant, hormonal turkey. Yum. And to top it all off, anybody in the family you're angry at is going to be there, including the assholes in the family who think they are better than everybody else and love to prove it and make people cry. That wasn't at my family's gathering, but at an ex's. So much fun. His sister cried and got drunk and the rest of the family got drunk and played annoying card games all night and drank Bud Light Lime. Gross.

I endured it, but help me if I didn't lie about needing to go home so I didn't have to come back the next morning. We luckily broke up before I could come to the Christmas party. Point is, holy shit, why? There is nothing less fun than going to a shitty family gathering where they have to warn you about a certain relative so you don't step on their toes later.

Lucky for me Brandon's family is awesome, but unlucky for anybody with a significant other whose family is shitty. You feel like a terrible person when you come back after an arduous meal with people you have no connection to. Aren't the holidays supposed to be cool, or does that die when Santa Claus dies?  Why do we keep up appearances when almost everybody hates the holidays? Or at least pretend Santa Claus exists.

Looks like the only way to enjoy the holidays is to be eight years old.

This is where we'll be spending the holidays. Hanging out with a microwave box we use as furniture, a console television, and plenty of computer games. And trying to tolerate the dicks upstairs.